Five bad things about depression

1. You are depressed

2. Bad fashion choices. Today, for example, I thought jeans, a green shirt and bright blue socks would be a good look.

3. Everyone seems so happy. REALLY annoying.

4. Everyone seems physically active. Double annoying.

5. You are depressed.

Five cool things about depression

1. Rapid weight loss, due to lack of appetite.

2. Unbridled empathy from friends and family who have never seen you like this.

3. Numerous compliments on your new weight. But please don't lose any more. Kate Moss would look HUGE next to you.

4. Rapid weight loss, due to lack of appetite.

5. Housework, indeed any kind of work, is granted a stay of execution. You can't DUST when all you want to do is jump in front of a moving train. Or at the very least sleep for five years straight.

Did I mention the weight loss?