who is the girl next door?

For many years, I have come across the phrase "the girl next door." This has been used to describe up-and-coming actresses, models and felons ("We are shocked by her homicidal rampage. She seemed like the typical girl next door!"). But who is this mythical creature, this girl next door?

The girl next door to me, growing up, was an overweight loudmouth who once tried to seduce a boy I was dating. She lured him into my bedroom, not noticing I was right outside the door. She pulled her shirt down to reveal her cleavage and laid suggestively on the bed, which then broke under her weight. I almost wet my pants from laughing.

When I had my first apartment, down the street from where OJ stabbed his wife, the girl next door was a 24-year-old Lebanese immigrant. She smelled of turmeric and rarely left the house. Not exactly the movie-star type.

My next residence, a townhouse, had a 75+ year old woman living next door. We had to pick her up from the hospital after she tumbled down a flight of stairs.

Does anyone actually live next to the quintessential girl next door, which based on popular culture we can only presume to be petite, blonde, Christian and a virgin? Who is this bitch?