Notes from the playground

1. If you have a toddler girl, please ensure she wears underwear. No one wants to see baby snatch when she goes up on the see-saw.

2. Carson is the name of a city. It should not be the name of a child.

3. No, thanks. Banana chips are gross.

4. If you have a nanny, check her Facebook account. Odds are she was posting while she was supposed to be watching your offspring.

5. If you can pinch an inch around your waist, why not get off the park bench and assist your kid as he threatens to plummet off the top of the slide? It will do you both good.