No Kogi Truck 4 U

This is funny, and also extremely sad.

Three times this week, we've tried to eat at the Kogi truck. For you non-LA readers (I believe there are now three of you), the Kogi is a Korean BBQ taco truck that cruises So Cal and serves up some amazing Korean/Mexican fusion food.

Or so we hear. If we could actually sample the goddamned fare we could judge for ourselves.

The big thing with this truck is that you have to check their Twitter page to find out where they are going to be on a given day. They don't park just, like, anywhere. So we made our first attempt last Friday night. J checked into it and reported the location as Abbot Kinney in Venice starting at 6:30. I had my doubts we would actually be able to drive into Venice at that time on a Friday, as it was already 5:45. But he was optimistic, so off we went.

We must have circled the parking lot where the truck was parked about five times. Not only was there absolutely no parking on the street or in any of the free and paid lots, you had to drive with one foot on the brakes to keep from hitting all the people walking and riding their bikes into the lot. The sidewalks were packed with people sitting down and gorging. The line for the truck stretched out for a quarter mile. It was clear that short rib tacos and sliders were not in our future. So we drove off for some Hawaiian BBQ, a poor substitution.

On Sunday, J looked at their page and said the truck was parked in the same lot from noon til 2 p.m. I thought it was odd that they would return so quickly to the same place and asked him if he was sure. He shot me a look that suggested he was.

We headed out once again to Venice. This time, there was ample parking on both the street and in the lot adjacent to where the truck was.

However, this time, there was no truck to be found.

After waiting 30 minutes, J broke out his Blackberry and hit Kogi's Twitter page.

"What day is today?" he asked.

"Sunday the eighth."

"Are you sure?"

I shot him a look that suggested I was. He tossed the BB on the floor and said, "I got the date wrong. Feel like Mexican food?"

Now I was pissed. We are both literate and college educated. Why did we keep screwing this up? Not to mention, diverting my taste buds was starting to become annoying.

Last night, J was more determined than ever to find this godforsaken truck. He looked up their Twitter page and also their Web page. "It's definitely tonight at 6," he told me. "We're leaving an hour early to get there and make sure we can park."

I grabbed my purse and stuck an apple in it, convinced he was wrong and we'd be starving and defeated in no time.

We made it to the lot, which was slowly starting to fill out, and waited. And waited. At 6:15, he grabbed his Blackberry, punched up their page and then screamed. "They changed the location! I looked it up and I SWEAR, it said they would be here today! I don't know what the hell is going on but this is goddamned bullshit..."

I had to tune it out, so sad for the tacos that had tormented me for three days . We ended up getting some pretty good gourmet hot dogs from another truck, but ultimately it was just another bait and switch, another substitute in our never-ending quest to sample what everyone seems to be eating so effortlessly.

J is now on a mission and is stalking the truck. I admire his determination but I can't get my hopes up. I've been let down too many times by the elusive street taco. Maybe one day our paths will cross. Until then, I will have to experience Kogi vicariously and, as Bette Midler sings, "From a distance..."